Saying Goodbye
A lot of parents have asked for advice on how to make a painless exit from daycare. It can be tempting to leave while kids are busy playing, to avoid the potential tears and drama, but for long term benefits I think saying goodbye is the way to go.
Kids cry for lots of reasons at daycare. It’s super normal. Sometimes, they’re afraid of the new space, the unfamiliar caregivers, and the whole concept of separation from their parents. A gentle approach is necessary, with lots of love and support, but you’re here because it’s time to take a big new step. Be honest with them.
A great goodbye-strategy, according to child behaviour researcher Dr. Gordon Neufeld, is to “bridge the separation” by including a story about what will happen when the separation is over. Remind them of your plan to have pasta for lunch, before you go visit grandma. You have lots of things to do together, after you get back.
Sometimes kids cry even though they have strong bonds with the staff, and know the kids and centre. They like daycare, and you know it, they just don’t want you to leave. Of course they don’t! But the fact remains that sometimes parents have to separate from children. Spend a few minutes explaining the reasons clearly.
“You can’t come with me, because I have to go to work/the doctor/the gym/class. You’re going to stay here and play, until I come back. That’s your job.”
Sometimes leaving something of yours’, like a scarf, or necklace, in their care can spark their sense of responsibility, and sometimes bringing something from home can make them feel safe.
Let your child know that you know it’s going to be fine. Show them where their water bottle is, if they get thirsty. Remind them about the bathroom, and tell them the teachers are going to take care of them while you’re gone. You’ll be back before they know it!
The teachers at Buddings are here to help! We help kids join activities, open snack boxes, and negotiate social interactions. We’re here to care, cuddle, and kiss it better. Whatever needs to happen, happens, and we always try to share the details of the visit with you. They’re your kids! Communication is key!
And so is confidence.
We know how much you love your kids. We see how they factor into all your decisions, and when you leave your child with us, we know it’s because you trust us to take care of them in your absence. We take that very seriously. And if we have juggle stuffed toys, play 100 rounds of peek-a-boo, or pretend we can’t do a puzzle without help, we are ridiculously proud to be the place you come to when you have to go.
